Whom I should cry for?

Back in time when in tatters was our love

speechless we stood in a train-station.

Holding hands, we’d wept for our failed love.

Pale went your face as you fought tears,

but feigned a shoot in your eyes.

Shrieking horns came then a blue train.

Home it carried you from me to a world

 Where you’d become a wife, mom and granny.

Stupefied, I was still watching the retreating train

that went running over my dreams.

The rolling devil now looked black not blue,

the color of my crying heart.

Leafing through my Memory Book,

your pretty face and mien I oft look.

Of course, the sparkling elegant eyes too

that spoke once volumes and volumes to me.

 Seeing your bubbling dimples when you laughed,

pits and wholes bobbed up in my heart.

All invigorating kisses your rosy lips gave me then,

still remain moist in my mouth, tasting like nectar.

The perfume and fragrance you’d wafted when hugged,

still remain spread in my body, making me ever balmy.

My Love!

When waves of Time brutally rock my boat,

on life’s sea I struggle like a goat.

Void and emptiness grow thick in heart,

as I wish to see the face I’d lost to Time.

My wishes … Oh!

Broken dead they go as no more you’re.

Gone you’re to the wind to become a wind;

to the moon to make her more shining.

to the grey sea to make her ever blue.

Shocked, I feel like falling into a caldron,

when your demise I know from a tabloid.

Bursting sobs I smother, breaking nerves I gather.

For, sorrows apart, there arise

a little relief in me, a cruel one at that.

Relieved I’m,

as I don’t see you time-torn or age-ravished.

For, your photo in the ‘obit’ column is

the one you gave me long, long back

when we were in the spring of love,

breathing for each other and praying for each other.

Now-

Straddling relief and sorrow ask my splitting heart,

‘Whom I should cry for?’

You or your failed love or your dead lover’.

*

[This is my first blog post I wrote for a site two decades before]